It took a lot of analysis to figure out if my date with Todd was a bad date, or just an indifferent date. I mean, I considered going out with him a second time, not because I was wildly attracted to him, which I was not, but because there was nothing overtly wrong with him. We met up during the hockey playoffs, in one of my local neighbourhood haunts. He’s from Mississauga, which he had just recently moved to in order to be closer to his job as an Air Traffic Controller. How cool is that? I mean, I think dating an Air Traffic Controller would be wicked cool. Type A personality, for sure. Just my type, I think. We had nothing else in common, other than the fact that I thought his job was cool, and so did he. He was from a small town and was intrigued by my big city ways, artsy tendencies and devil-may care attitude. I like dating pilots (his former job) since there’s usually travel opportunities. Shhhh… that’s not shallow, it’s practical.
So needless to say, being unfamiliar to the big city, he was late. And in the intervening wait time, I had a sudden urge to flee. Being in one of my local pubs meant that there was a good chance that I would run into someone I knew, and I did. My entire family. Both my brothers and their wives (ok, one wife, one girlfriend). I begged then to keep their distance as this was a date, and already a socially awkward situation. I mean, can you image? “Nice to meet you Todd, this is my entire family who will be judging your every action.” They were well behaved, and only came to bug me as they were leaving, at which point they were introduced. What bugged me more is that Todd was annoyed that I didn’t introduce them earlier, nor have any inclination for us to join them. Sorry, but not my style—see comment above. Little things kept gnawing at me, but they were petty. He looked awful when he laughed, something that should happen to no one. Laughing traditionally makes everyone beautiful, or should, anyways. He had an awful earring, which he explained as his only shot at rebellion. Rebel on, white boy. But nothing was genuinely that bad. Neutral, but not bad.
Until the post date made the date bad.
He called me the next morning, explaining that if he was up after a late night out with me, I should be up too. Ok, if not a little too familiar for me. He asked if I wanted to go bowling with him and his sister, who was coming into town to visit. Now, just because you happen to meet my family in a bar does not mean that I want to meet yours the next day. He called again in the afternoon, and again in the evening. He called the following day, and the day after that. And then he lost his job and left sad messages on my machine like “You’re probably working right now, but of course, I’m not any more.” Yikes! One night out and I’m suddenly your only support system. Slow it down, farm boy. It took me over a week of not returning his messages to finally stop hearing from him. I like eager, but not desperate. One date does not a relationship make. He had shown no stalker tendencies while we were out, but making me wish my number was unlisted is just wrong. Next time, I’m looking for aloof. And an only child.
